Puppetry of the penis

Every man, once or twice (or more) in their life, has done the ole' "up and down" with their penis. They've faced their girlfriend, boyfriend or mirror, and thrust their hips back and forth, waving their penis around like the American flag on a windy day. These gentlemen have taken a man's silly penis play to a new level.

It was inevitable, wasn't it? Two men with giant skinny penises making bank by twisting, pulling, folding, hiding, and yes, tying their unmentionables into strange designs. The only tricks I could do before seeing this on HBO's "Real Sex" show 79 or whatever were the talking penis head, the twist and shout, and the one that every man does but doesn't admit, the 'ole "I'm a woman" where the penis is tucked tightly between the legs.

But the puppetry has taught me much more. I can't achieve the true artistry and impersonations that they can accomplish, but I can certainly form the hamburger and I'm getting better at the snail.

I don't know what it is about the male species that makes them want to show their penises to a willing audience in all its shapes and wondrous pliability. It's something innate, like wanting to pay for dinner, flaunt nice things and hump frequently. The puppetry of the penis is just like that, but less publicized. Simon and David of the giant penises will change all that with their show. Either that, or this show portends the doom of the human race, where penises are formed into hamburgers for all to witness and delight.